This post is part of a series chronicling my meditation journey. You can find a list of the whole series here.
I've been planning to start this journey for a week now, but could never find the time to get started. That's always the way it is for me -- I can't seem to find the time. Well, today I decided to MAKE the time.
It's important to me to create a ritual for my meditation practice. Something that tells my body and my mind that it's time to get quiet.
I began by sitting on a pillow on the floor of my bedroom, legs crossed, and back against my cedar chest to help with my posture. The room was dimly lit, and I placed a small unscented candle on a small plate on the floor in front of me. I started my "Meditation" music on my iPhone, set a timer for 20 minutes, and closed my eyes.
I was afraid to try to sit for a whole 20 minutes. That's a really long time in my world. But that's what the book suggested, and I really want to try to follow along as closely as I can.
At first I was very distracted. My mind was racing, and I could hear John and Kayla talking in the living room and car doors slamming outside the bedroom window. But I stuck with it. I just "watched" the distractions, which is what this first lesson is about. I didn't try to quiet my mind, and I did not have any expectations.
It wasn't long before my legs started to ache and my right foot went numb. It became a little bit painful at first, but I just took note of it. I kept telling myself that I could continue to sit for one more minute. And then another minute. And then another. Soon after, the discomfort didn't subside, but diminished enough to allow me to remain seated in that position.
I did check the clock once during the session, and had nine minutes remaining. At that point, I knew I could finish the 20 minutes.
Overall, the time went by quickly. At the end, I felt relaxed, but mostly proud of myself for completing this first day.